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24 search results for "James Hollis"

  1. patterns of cultural influences and personal biographies
    where we find patterns, we also will likely find core, emotion-laden ideas within us … internalised messages from daily life (from popular media,
    #culture #relationship
  2. work on one person myself
    I work on the one person I can work on, myself, to try to render myself more amenable to creative living in the presence of change, ambiguity, and
    #creating #courage #change
  3. asking of the other what we are not addressing ourselves
    projection and transference two dynamics of relationships our existential proclivities to fear and lethargy, and both nemeses win more battles than
    #heroic #relationship
  4. adapting by curbing our desires
    we learned early that trying out who we are in the world often produced negative reactions … we learned to curb our desires, adapt, perhaps even
    #desires
  5. transferring journey to companionship
    loneliness that serves both the achievement of personhood and the quality of any relationship … the more one can embrace one’s separateness, the
    #journey #solitude #individuality
  6. life is a series of attachment and losses
    the nature of our psyche is based on change, growth, curiosity, and imagination. But there are very conservative elements within us that retain a
    #change #perseverance #resistance
  7. suffering disconnect from meaning
    we are the animal that suffers disconnect from meaning … our system produces a complex series of interactions — feeling responses, dreams ranging
    #meaning #choice
  8. experts of fear and confusion
    The world is full of people who will tell you who you are, what you are, and what you are to do and not to do, they wander amid their unaddressed
    #experts #journey #accountability
  9. individuation comes from the little people
    Jung once noted that individuation does not come from on high, from the royal ego managing affairs, but from “the little people,” the split-off
    #individuality
  10. taking responsibility for not committing a soul-crime
    a direct function of one’s ability to take responsibility for choices, to cease blaming others or expecting rescue from them, and to acknowledge the
    #choice #individuality
  11. to be afraid of the powers within
    Chögyam Trungpa defines the warrior not as an agent of destruction but as one who is “brave” … the definition of bravery: not being afraid of
    #courage #power
  12. longing for the freedom of our chains
    the frequent choice to remain within the predictable, the safe, the familiar, even the miserable, thinking it preferable to the uncertainty of the
    #choice #responsibility
  13. hero quest unifying pattern
    one of the two great unifying mythic patterns (the other being the Eternal Return, the death-rebirth cycle), is the mythologem of the hero quest,
    #journey #myth #heroic
  14. to show up in the best way we can
    shift from dependent psychology to psychospiritual independence perverse twins fear and lethargy That is all that life really asks of us, to show up
    #journey #courage #stoic
  15. perverse twins fear and lethargy
    managing fear through unreflective compliance, or avoidance; lethargy takes many seductive forms … avoid tasks, stay away from what is difficult for
    #courage #distraction
  16. fear and desire for solicitude of mother
    any child longs for Mother’s solicitude … mother betrayed her role and forever charged that feminine imago … with fear sufficient to match the
    #mother #security #childhood
  17. beeing a grown-up in a contemporary culture
    contemporary culture … been grown-ups through responsibly exercising parental, fiduciary, relational, and societal roles … we play all these mature
    #culture #individuality
  18. the ubiquity of the experience of loneliness
    life begins with traumatic separation … (and) is spent trying either to recover that lost connection by some form of regressive impulse or to
    #solitude
  19. triune task insight courage endurance
    finding personal authority requires two things: sorting through the traffic within and living what we find with courage and consistency Jung
    #perseverance #reality #triplicity
  20. exigencies of childhood vulnerability
    the literal dependence of terribly vulnerable child on its relationships is profoundly overlearned, overconditioned … it becomes difficult later to
    #solitude #childhood #courage
  21. freedom to choose recoils in anxiety of change
    never in human history have individuals been freer to choose their life path, their values, and to serve what is true for them. what is most
    #individuality #change #culture
  22. fate commencing second half of life
    the second half of life occurs when people, for whatever reason — death of partner, end of marriage, illness, retirement, whatever — are obliged to
    #individuality
  23. admire the lives of others
    if we but knew what drove, hounded, and compelled those whom we admire, we might truly not want to live their lives after all. few of us realise
    #relationship #collective
  24. projection and transference two dynamics of relationships
    a projection is a mechanism whereby our psychological contents leave us … seeking an object — a person, an institution, a role — upon which to
    #relationship