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❚ autotelic ❚ introspective ❚ artist ❚ individuality

atomic notes and incremental writing

synthes

This site serves as my private notebook — a collection primarily comprised of clippings from the literary works I delve into. However, these are not mere excerpts; rather, they are meticulously transformed snapshots. I adapt, edit, and merge these snippets, forging connections between them according to my intrinsic vision while intentionally keeping the sources somewhat elusive. This design reflects my focus on growth and change, rather than a sprawling accumulation of factual knowledge. Whether we label it a “zettelkasten” or a “second brain” matters little to me — I question the conventional belief that acquiring vast quantities of information is of utmost importance, especially in a world steeped in ambiguity, with big data handed to the machines.

Mistaking the act of collecting data for true understanding means missing out on the living world itself. Understanding is akin to the ripening of a fruit, carefully nurtured and harvested at the appropriate moment. Plucking someone else’s fruitful results will never yield the same satisfaction as cultivating and tending to your own. To truly comprehend the intricacies of life, we must study ourselves first — and such a study amounts to turning our gaze inward and trusting our intuition.

In the ever-evolving terrain of a curious mind, the notion of accumulating an immutable collection of clippings and citations proves inadequate in cultivating novelty and originality. In each encounter with a previously read work, my perspective shifts like a kaleidoscope, giving birth to a unique collage of meanings. It’s as if the new season of life invites me to behold the familiar through an extraordinary lens. Thus, I embark upon a pilgrimage of rediscovery, wherein the interplay of symbols and interpretations guides me deeper into the realm of understanding. The substance of the fleeting notes takes on a symbolic nature, akin to white garments delicately hung by colorful clothespins on a whimsical line. In the gentle breeze, they sway and flutter, spreading the semiotic essence that intertwines with my thoughts and guides me towards the new insights, creating a mosaic of understanding.

At moments, I find myself captivated by the interconnections among notes, observing how certain themes and intentions gradually flourish or get dim over time, independent of any external influences or personal exertion. It’s akin to a sprawling tree with countless branches and an abundance of buds, though most may never blossom or even sprout a hint of green. Occasionally, I indulge in making an abstract drawing. I embrace the freedom of the freehand, reminding myself to move the pencil with rhythm and fluidity, allowing the strokes to unfold gracefully. At times, I drift off to sleep with an earbud hanging off my ear and a pencil lost between the folds of the bedsheets.

On my end this site functions as a simple text-file folder, I have maintained for the past six years, migrating it from one application to another. It is presently served by “blot”, which I appreciate for balance of function and simplicity. In the early days, the folder served exclusively as my personal journal, where I diligently compartmentalized the intrinsic aspects. Later the line between inherent and extrinsic, between “their words” and “mine” blured. The dichotomy became ontology: I came to understand that all the words are borrowed, and no thought stands as completely original. The essence of genuine craftsmanship does not reside in the “creation,” particularly when writing becomes a process of words manufacturing. Here, I find myself inadvertently disappointing the last Christian among us. For in the most esoteric sense, it is the act of “remembering” and not “creation” that holds sway.

In the intricate workings of our minds, the distinction between the utterances “I don’t have a ticket to Mars” and “I have a ticket to Mars” fades into insignificance. For in every given moment, the mind’s concern lies in the pursuit of the immidiate truth. All other truths, however relevant they may appear, must yield and bide their time. This pursuit, this relentless search, compels us with an insistent urgency, as we weave through the patchwork of truths, implicitly aware of the endless expanse stretching forth, prompting us to adopt more tools and techniques to match such immensity.

“Less wisdom in more time” becomes my retort to the speed readers, biohackers, metrics crunchers, and unicorn capturers of this age. The obsession with efficiency, the constant calculation of how we allocate our time and resources, strikes me as vastly overrated. While conserving energy has its benefits, what actually happens is the shrinking of the self, and it moves us away from the arena of imagination. In the relentless pursuit of safeguarding our personal reservoirs and accumulating time, fortified with structured frameworks that delineate our human development, prioritizing relentless growth, we discover that the measuring of each individual life by a uniform yardstick and the pursuit of mere arbitrary milestones brings us no nearer to resolving the intricacies of our personal and collective predicaments, achieving inner serenity, and envisioning a future of sustainability, abundance, and the possibilities inherent in a post-scarcity world. In fact, it is as if our efforts amount to mere inaction, leaving us adrift in a sea of unfulfilled promises and elusive aspirations, still clinging to our pride, the social statuses and the stature of normalcy.

While perusing my site may prove beneficial to a select few, I suspect that its utility in a conventional sense may not be widespread. The preceding 900 words should serve as ample evidence that this platform serves as both an artistic outlet and a tool for enhancing my own productivity. While many pages contain links to other content and atomic notes, some links may lead to a “not found” page. This can occur for several reasons, such as certain texts are excluded from the server while still referenced on my end, or because the note has undergone a transformation into a different form. With that said, I sincerely hope you find enjoyment in this experiment of mine, and should you wish to connect or simply say hello, please don’t hesitate to get in touch with me.

linked mentions for "about this site":
  1. bender

    As of this moment, I have been in my forties for a straight 15 hours, five of which I spent sleeping. So far, so good! Today, I am launching a new website and starting a newsletter, sending out its first issue called "Bender." Take a look at the latest artwork and subscribe to the emails!

  2. heron

    In this letter, I explore the metaphor of the Heron battle an inner voice of doubt, represented by a croaking frog. I relate this to doing meaningful creative work by outlining principles from Steven Pressfield's “Do the Work.” We must engage with resistance and persist despite the obstacles. Just as the Heron achieves flight through courage and determination, we realise our potential by battling resistance and ship our creative or entrepreneurial work.